my sanctuary

my thoughts for my own reflection.

N/A March 20, 2006

Filed under: Life oh life! — jido @ 8:27 pm

I feel pregnant. Not that I’ve ever been to actually know what it’s like. But arrgghh, nothing is right. Everything puts me off. My appetite is unbelieavable. I’ve been grouchy for the most part of the day. Thank God I didn’t have company during those times, coz oh boy, I would have lost some friends there. When you’re in that mood and you’re alone. All you can do is dwell yourself in self-pity and then start counting on the calories that you’ve consumed for the day. That in the end will make you cry till your contact lenses go dry.

Crying for no reason. It seems to be the only thing that I’m good at nowadays. I told you, I don’t know why. So, don’t ask why! And why the hell am I professing my inward insecure feelings to the public nih? This is supposed to be personal am I right? Not my blog, these stupid feelings. What choice do I have when I’ve got no other outlet? Write it on paper? Hell yeah. I will end up scratching the table with my pencil till my ears go deaf. Vent it out on him? Great, more self-pity after he decides to leave this madwoman (not that I haven’t done enough already for him to do that). Call mama? Nak cakap apa woi kalau sendiri pon tak tahu apa sebab. Talk to my friends? Like they haven’t got enough problems in their hands for me to add to the list.

Is this even helping me? I guess, to a certain extent. I get to see that I’m actually exaggerating the stuff that are actually bugging me. The more I think about them, the bigger they get in my head. So stop thinking about it. See, in the end I get to the core of it; why is it that I’m so upset. There, there, slow down already.

Right, i’m gonna go get myself out of this state of whatever-ness. Don’t you dare judge me after reading this okay. We all have our moments. Haihhh, brain cramps AND tummy cramps. What else is new?


8 Responses to “N/A”

  1. cik kinut baik Says:

    it might be…PMS?? chill girl, we all have one of those days. it’s not weird.

    just keep a positive mind..u got a new harrods cute bag, u got great friends, and of coz…cuti is coming!!

    cheer up jidon ^^

  2. natte' Says:

    it’s alright dude.. you’re ok 🙂
    it is just one of those dayss.. it’ll get by.. 😉

    just think of me n then u’ll smile again!! muahahah.. (sooo perasan!! — ignore me :P)

    nwayss, cheer up mate! we’re all coming to c u in about two weeks!! then we’ll hav lotsa fun k?? cant wait 🙂

    take care dearest!!

  3. ~Nana~ Says:

    chill! i bile dekat nak period pun macam tu, akan nangis tak tentu hala. so u r not an alien. no worries sweetie.

  4. erin Says:

    hye dear..hope ur feeling better now.i had this kinda feelings before..masa tuh aku nak makan mac n cheese..and yet my perut was damn kosong..
    so i cooked the mac and cheese..and makan la kan..with my perut kosong..
    suddenly..i went all dizzy..the whole day i got headache..nak bangun malas..perut rasa tak sedap jer..end up..i puked the whole mac n cheese..ingatkan sebab dat mac n cheese..rupanye my gastric..serious..
    takde selera and yes..the feeling was like mengandung..huhuhu…hope u dah ok la dear..take care~ mmuahss!!

  5. Sarah Says:

    Jiddy, there is never anything that is more important than you so if you ever need to talk I’m 5 long strides away! (Yes, I did just work that one out because I’m a loser like that!) Love you honey xxxx

  6. mekna Says:

    jid…aku rs sbb ko rindu kt aku kot…hahahahaha…weh aku rindu gle kt ko…cpt2 blk mesia…we’ve got loads to catch up!!!hehe….nnti aku mntk permission nk buat aktivt thnn kite…huhu….miss you

  7. jido Says:

    Sarah – Sorry for being less talkative yesterday. Love you to pieces u know that?  for being so understanding. xxxxxxxxx

    mekna!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! – I DO miss you!! hell yeah, we’ve got loads to catch up. better work on that permission right away! aaaa, rindunye…

    The other four sweet n caring friends have already been addressed in today’s entry. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  8. shera Says:

    jid! wut happen?
    eyyy the manja girl..
    meh cite ngan aku meh..

    take care tau..

    be strong girl

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